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You have to pick:

Everyone you know forgets about you
 
or
 
An unkillable spirit of vengeance keeps striking you repeatedly with an ordinary tablespoon. Each blow is only a minor annoyance, and you can run away from it for brief periods of time, but it will always follow you and will never, ever stop.

 
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greathouse.kyle  

ahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahahh ... spoon
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