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Options 1064 to 1074
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Correct grammar was no longer required in any circumstances (including books, newspapers, legal documents)
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It turns out dogs are the smartest beings on the planet and humans exist mainly to serve them
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Be extremely competent but have no self confidence
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Every second cell in your body duplicates
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Eat dog food
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Use the washroom, look in the bowl, and see maggots
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Compulsively end every sentence with the word "pie"
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Sit at a desk all day
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Genuinely believe you are much better liked and much more admired than you really are
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Your two closest male co-workers walk up to your desk, pee on it (while chatting about sports) then walk away as if nothing happened