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Options 1632 to 1642
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Be a cat-sized beast covered with tentacles
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Toilet paper feels like sandpaper
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Your only method for communicating with other humans was Facebook
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Have an odd and irritating little laugh after every sentence you utter (uncontrollably), all the time
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Never be able to eat solid food again
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Be unable to uncover your private parts when you need to use the restroom
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Have an arm for a leg
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Get put in an insane asylum when you're not crazy
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Have projectile fiarrhoea
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Find out that your spouse had a sex change before they met you