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  1. Be Jabba the Hutt
  2. Everyone thinks that you're actually a dog and treats you like one
  3. An unkillable spirit of vengeance keeps striking you repeatedly with an ordinary tablespoon. Each blow is only a minor annoyance, and you can run away from it for brief periods of time, but it will always follow you and will never, ever stop.
  4. Humanity is brought to the brink of extinction by a pandemic.
  5. Wake up one morning to find that, although you haven't actually changed genders, you look like you have.
  6. Forget about everyone you know
  7. Sweat cheese
  8. Have a heart attack
  9. Be a turkey weighing everyone else down
  10. Wake up covered with cockroaches


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