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Options 747 to 757
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Become an anthropomorphic cat. Everyone recognizes that you're intelligent and humanoid and can speak, but you nevertheless have the social and legal status of a regular cat.
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Every sentence you speak or write contains a swear word
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Have prehensile hair
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Your life depends on you completing a certain task. You understand the task well, and what it is trying to accomplish, but you are given no further guidance.
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Eat a $50 bill
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Be famous for doing something stupid
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In 24 hours someone, somewhere in the world will flip a coin. Heads you die, tails you become omnipotent
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Take the red pill
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Grow ram's horns
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Listen to country music