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Options 877 to 887
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Transform into the same gender as the nearest person to you at any given time.
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Have loved and lost
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Turn into a penguin every time you have to poop
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Eat nuts and gum together
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Run two city blocks wearing only chainmail (no padding or clothing beneath)
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Gain invulnerability and super-strength, but transform into a monstrous gorilla-like creature.
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Thou must speaketh only in Early Modern English (aka "Shakespearean" English), with thee/thou/thy/thine/etc.
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Fart in an elevator every time there is only one other person in it
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Continuously swap wardrobes with the person closest to you
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Justin Beiber dies, but you have to go to his funeral where they play all his songs back to back in memory of him