I already smoke.

No change then

Smoking is a gamble with death so...

I could probably survive a fridge falling on me.

Depends whether it's falling over onto me from a location standing on the floor next to me, or if it's falling from above somehow. My initial impression is to assume that it's toppling over from a standing position, which I agree is very survivable.

How big is this fridge?

Average size. Not a bear fridge or some industrial thing. Just a regular, average, fridge.