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Every second cell in your body duplicates
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Have hands at the end of your legs
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Sit at a desk all day
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Live as a Dwarf in the Dwarf Fortress universe
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Win the lottery, tell all your friends you've won, start celebrating, but then, as you go to pick up your money you realize you read the ticket wrong and you didn't actually win
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From now on your favorite food loses all flavor to you
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Get a cold sore
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Be one of Santa's reindeer
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Clean 12 pig pens
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Only be able to read things backwards