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  1. Each morning your alarm clock goes off at the worst possible time in your sleep cycle (within an hour of the set time)
  2. Humans were marsupials
  3. 50% of the time when you go to speak you just mumble incoherently
  4. A bizarre mishap leaves you a quadruple amputee, but gives you invulnerability and the ability to fly like superman
  5. Live a life without pizzas
  6. Live in a world of perpetual Groundhog Day
  7. Find out the Little Richard is your real father
  8. A bum off the street walks up to you and licks your face three times
  9. Get beat up by Jackie Chan
  10. Eat cheese for breakfast, lunch and dinner for a year


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