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  1. Every morning you must wait while makeup is applied to make you appear as a Klingon
  2. Have large rat-like incisors. They grow continuously, requiring you to gnaw on things or grind them regularly to keep them from getting too long
  3. Your only method for communicating with other humans was Facebook
  4. Over a 40 day period the water level of the earth rises to 1 foot above Mount Everest, it stays at that level for 40 days, then recedes over 40 days.
  5. Wherever you go, all electronic devices within 10 meters of you disintegrate
  6. Toilet paper feels like sandpaper
  7. Have an arm for a leg
  8. Have an odd and irritating little laugh after every sentence you utter (uncontrollably), all the time
  9. Never be able to eat solid food again
  10. Be unable to uncover your private parts when you need to use the restroom


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