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Options 770 to 780
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There are no cats in America
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Run two city blocks naked
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Only wear plaid for the rest of your life
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Have telekinesis but it gave you a very abnormally large head
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Alien space bats scoop up your home city and deposit it on the shallow continental shelf several hundred miles offshore from Florida. Since they're benevolent, they turn everyone brought along with it into merfolk.
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Use Yahoo
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Every toe you cut off is worth $10,000
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Horses poop ice cream. Each breed poops a different flavor. There is no other source of ice cream.
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Drink from the firehose
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Everyone starts calling you Abigail with no explanation and look at you funny if you claim that Abigail is not your name